Say it With a Robot!
John Cameron Fielder understands. Not only is he a former HFR editor, but he has a bona fide MFA. So, he gets it. And now you can get it, too. For $5 on his Etsy site, Marginal Sentiments, you can buy greeting cards that say what you mean.
This charming robot, for example, announces: "I'm an emotionless automaton, and even I can see you're loveable."
Right? That's not even my favorite! Get shopping.